Feeling of emptiness

I must be a very strange person. When I saw the video of fireworks, others might feel it was beautiful and healing, but when I think back to the fireworks and snow I saw in winter, I don’t seem to feel anything. What will happen next? Melancholy and emptiness. Maybe deep in my heart I still hope to find someone to stay with me for the rest of my life, family, lover, and friends are the same, but what is eternal? If living in this world is full of sorrow and suffering, leaving may not be a bad choice.

I thought I could relax and be happy during the summer vacation, but after only two days, I felt sad instead of relieved. Shopping and chatting are not uninteresting, but I seem to be tired of them. I don't know why.

-2023-7-4